There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
