Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
