She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
