YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize