Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
