Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
