you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize