so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
