you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
