He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
