I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize
