Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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