we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
