I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
