When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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