you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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