YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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