someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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