She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
