Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
