You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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