Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
