Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
