I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
