come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize