Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize