The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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