Where did you get a picture of my penis
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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