I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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