i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize