My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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