my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
