How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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