Ketchup is God's man juice
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Can I color on your dick again?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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