just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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