I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
