Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Randomize