Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I use my feet as sexual weapons
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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