Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize