Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
