real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
