You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
my shit smells like andre
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
