i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
sarcasm needs its own font
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
