Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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