Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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