just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize