We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Randomize
