So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize