I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
