On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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