I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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