Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
